I am grateful to Ryan. Because for some reason, he has a gift of seeing things a different way and making use of that unique perspective. Would I have embraced this huge adventure on my own? I ask myself that on occasion, and I’m honestly not sure. Probably not, though. I am much more inclined to follow the crowd. It is easier and less stressful that way–although not as fulfilling and rewarding.
Ryan has opened my eyes–I know it sounds sappy, but it is true, and it’s been that way since our first date. The world is so much bigger, freer, and fuller to me when I’m with him. And I think for my part, I help to ground him a bit in the practical and smart (read: more secure) way of doing things.
Fortunately, I am living proof that people can change. The more time that passes, the more comfortable I get with the unknown, the more free I feel, the more I want to think and do things regardless of the opinions of others. I like to get advice from those I am closest to, but I feel it is healthier to get advice and then ultimately decide what is best for you. Only you can know that, after all.
These are the ideals that Ryan has taught me these 5+ years of marriage. (And I hope I’ve imparted some of myself to him as well. I’m pretty confident I have.)
It hasn’t always been easy to have these kinds of differences with your spouse. I can look back on very painful moments that seemed unbearable at the time but that ultimately helped me to grow and change for the better (or so I hope). My true wish is to be able to explore and become better acquainted with myself and Ryan on this journey. I’d say I’m already on the right track.
And to those single ladies looking for a man: it may be hard at times, but in the long run, I think it’s more exciting and fulfilling to find someone who will challenge your view and push you to explore scary parts of yourself. You’ll be better because of it.